iF I Had WiNGs ....

If I had Wings ,
I would spread it wide ,
Fly far far away ,
and say Goodbye .

To this world .

Where Black can become White .
Where a mother could bear
to abandon her child .
Too live her sinful life .

Where politicians would fight,
Over a position to make decisions ,
Which are mostly never done .

Where PAIN lingers among the teenagers,
where only a few are able to step out alive ,
not destroyed .

Where needs are hardly met ,

Hearts Broken,

Families divide ,

sadness. . .

Darkness . . .

FEAR . . .

hatred .

But God never gave me wings ,
that away with I could never fly ,
ever wonder WHY?

So that I would stay right here ,
to pray for this generation ,
turn from their wicked ways ,
through Christ .

ps: God fill me with your love, becuase with mine alone , I will not survive .

Vincent.

day in day out...

-I suddenly had a crave for the bible.... dun know why , but i thought it was good.

-have started reading mark .

- those who came to this blog. please leave a message at the chat box...
-so i'll know you came...

anyway besides denise , victor, caleb, joanne ,jeremy, serah , the other people shouldn't know about this blog .

so kindly please be gone , if you're not suppose to read .

anyway back to my life .

It wasn't so much of a sad day today , beside the black eyes rings i'm having , becuase I didn't have a good sleep due to the BLAZING weather .

i'm just trying spam , trying to type out everything i want to....lalalalalla...

so idiotic.

sometimes the world turns at a constant time , but sometimes , I doubt .Coz is like time Flies so FAST when you are having a great time .
But its as slow as a tortoise .

sometimes i feel like i'm all alone , eventhought there's lik eso much people around you .

I'm now teaching guitar, it sux, i feel like giving up the class... its not about the students , IT's ME ..... it'slike after the full long day , fomr morining 8 till afer practise at 3:30 , you'll have to teach another lesson. freaking tiring you know . God, please send someone to help me .

"Sometimes life is like sine curve" . that wad people say . But mine is like a tangent curve . it goes up...up.up. and to thye infinity when you really can say ...wha.a.... i'm so high ....so happy, Then ...BOOm....down you go....and then up up up again....BOOM! ...

i hate that...can it be less drastic.....

I'm just crapping....but at least i'm more real now. not the fake-y fake-y vincent i use to be .

trying to eat least , do more exxercise. Build quality muscles .maybe can reach 80 bye next year...i'm now around 88 , was 96 last year ... not bad aye ...

I've met a new girl . but not that kind of gurl. not intertested in her . but sms-ing her at the moment . she more or less hae some problem with her bf .really sad at the moment. I just want ot be someone who will be there for her . yet i dun want to commit my whole life to her that kind of thing...i just hope she doesn't get the wrong idea.

seriously , i think i still do like XxxXxx . its like , i dunnoe . it still makes my heart beat faster when i talk to her . Its like when i see her laughing off hapily with another guy,I green with jealousy. it sux. i really do wish to just put he behind. all the more i still wish she would be by my side .



I want lay my hand around her waist .Hold her tight .swipe her hair aside , and place it behind her ears .And then lay a gentle kiss on her naked forehead. nicely, sweetly , making her feel the most blessed girl there is on earth. I want to feel her warmth , on my chest , as she lay her head on it . i want to smell the warm feeling aroma that arises form her body . pleasurable, loving , and kind.

Pissing me Off

Look here . XxxXxxXxxx ,
I've given grace and grace enough .

1) What have I written that has actually polluted your blog? the only ppl polluting your tag box is you and your stepmother . Seriously CHECK IT FOR YOURSELF !!! Not a single Judgement or POLLUTING PHRASE have I used . All i wanted to do is to care and give encouragement, and all I got was some polluting judgement , when I got all the blames for polluting .

2) to CY : I've really Been thinking through this situation . And here's my result . You've talked "senselessly ". If all that you wanted to do was to prove your loyalty to your step-daughter , you've already very well done it . Let me ask you a question . HOW MUCH DO YOU KNOW ABOUT ME ? You barely just know my name . You've made your judgement based on this situation . Having to only know me out of this "whole miscommunication" you've already pre-judge me on who I really am . I've not judge you yet . I still think that you're someone interesting of which i would really want to know someday . And If we do really get to know each other , I hope it will be a pleasant meeting . Lastly , here's my advice , something my father taught me .

" Its never fair to judge someone on a single situation , because everyone has faults in their lives , yet many other good things in other areas ."

3)To XxxXxxXxxx ,

I've never said any nasty things to you yet .So appreciate and be contented . Because I'm seriously holding back everything I really can be . You've seriously gotten me really confused once and again . And you really didn't know wad you have done to me . You said you liked this guy , I said don't tell him that you like him , cause it'll any not do you good. What i really meant was that you should take time to know him . When I said that "you don't know wad you doing" , You told me "I know my feelings" . BUT WAD ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE , WAD ABOUT ME ? DID YOU SPARE A THOUGHT FOR MY FEELINGS . I told you that I don't have much people coming to me telling me they have feelings for me . When you said that you liked me that lil bit , I treasured you like a child to its mother . You were a rare chance . Do you think then I would have given you up that easily ? THINK !

All my friends that knew who you were told me to forget all about you and never even think of being even a friend , BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT WORTH IT .They said you were a brat , and never really treasure much of your friends . BUT STILL , I procrastinated and came back to encourage you . I used the name sara was so that it wouldn't stir up any misunderstanding. And guess wad , ALL YOU DID WAS TO DO THE WORST .

Of all of these , I wouldn't blame you , and I've long forgiven you . I've been trying to remind myself once and again , that you're 14 . And that we were of different thinking maturity . So there's nothing to be angry about .

Lastly , its not wrong to have faults , but its totally wrong to dwell and deny your faults . Please do grow out of it .

" Do What You Need To Do ,

So You Can Do What You Want To Do "

James .L . Farmer

Touch of pain

Wad can be worst?
When all confusion hits you from the back of your head.
When you're misunderstood .
When you do come in like a welcomed guest , when you didn't know you were not !
When you're pre-judged a loser and a Fat Axx.
When you really want to fight back ,
But everything you were taught by the church tells you not to .
When really all that you wanted to do was to care ,
And all that you get in return is judgement , and accusations.
When people do make you look like someone you're not .

What do you know ?
What happen to all the sweet talks you gave me? FALSE HOPE
What am I to you? Rubbish ? some guy you can just kick around becuase I have a soft heart?

Talking about hearts , try to remember all the freaking times you said you liked me of my big heart .

I guess you weren't what I thought you were.
I was just totally attracted by the mature voice , and total demure poise

And of all of these , i'll congratulate you XxxXxxXxxx
you are the first girl in this WHOLE UNIVERSE


to make me DRIP A TEAR .

You already gave me a wound , but you just made is deeper



For you information
L33 was a name for the first person who ever touched my heart,
Sa was your name
L33Sa was a name i used to remind myself to never again let myself touch love .

CAUSE IT HAS BROUGHT ME NOTHING BUT PAIN